Transactional Analysis describes that we all communicate from three ego states: Parent, Adult, and Child. This is not about right or wrong – all three are important parts of us. But under pressure, we can lose balance and get stuck in one of them.

Take a moment to reflect:

1. From which state do I most often speak when under pressure?
   Is it the Parent taking over – controlling or protective?
   Or the Child, withdrawing and adapting, or becoming freer, more impulsive, and perhaps a bit anarchic?

2. How does it affect my communication with others?
   Notice how that part of you influences the mood and the relationship.

3. What helps me return to the Adult position? Maybe time, calm, a conversation, laughter, fresh air – or just a few deep breaths.

The goal is not to be in the “Adult” position all the time – but to notice when you lose balance and find your way back to yourself.

You can also turn your thoughts to the Red–Green–Blue model: When you speak from your Parent position, is it from the red, overinvolved field – where you take too much responsibility – or from the blue, where you withdraw and lose engagement?

The Adult position in Transactional Analysis corresponds to the green field in the model – where you are attuned, present, and able to listen, think, and act thoughtfully.

This is where balance resides.

Read more about the Red–Green–Blue model HERE, where there is also a link to purchase a poster of the model.