Catch-22: When professionalism makes it difficult to make use of support from others

The problem is therefore not the professional ideals themselves. The problem may arise when these ideals begin to take up so much space that there is less room for the parts of the job that involve being affected, seeking collegial sparring, and making use of support from others along the way. For some, it can almost feel like a threat to their professional identity – as though the need for support reveals that they are somehow not fully living up to the demands of the profession.

This is what we call the professional identity Catch-22: "If I accept support, people – including myself – will think I cannot handle the job. If I do not, they will be proven right."

The false opposition

Many professionals can therefore find themselves caught in a kind of false opposition: either you handle strain on your own, or you risk appearing less professional. But perhaps the opposite is actually true.

No one performs particularly well under prolonged overload. Professional judgement may also involve being able to recognise your own reactions in time and respond wisely to them. In that sense, collegial support is not only a matter of care. It also becomes part of the professional work of maintaining quality, perspective, and risk management.

The skilled professional is therefore not the person who can endure the most alone, but the person who knows when it is important to involve others and make use of support from them.

Collegial support as professional practice

We often talk about support as if it is something one person gives to another. But in professional communities, collegial support rarely works like that. Of course, collegial support is also about care. But it is equally about coordination, sharing strain, maintaining a shared overview, and ensuring the quality of the work.

When people work closely with crises, conflict, or human suffering, being affected becomes part of the working conditions. In these situations, collegial support becomes a way of helping one another continue to think clearly, maintain sound judgement, and preserve quality in the work. When we distribute pressure, it becomes easier to make good decisions. And when no one has to stand alone with what is difficult, work becomes more sustainable – both professionally and personally.

In that sense, collegial support is not something separate from the core task. It is an important part of professional practice and, incidentally, not something that leaves the giver “empty” and the receiver “full”. On the contrary, it strengthens relationships within the group, trust in one another, and the experience of shared responsibility.

Accepting support is also a way of supporting others

We often think of help as something one-directional: one person gives, one person receives. But in practice, it is far more reciprocal than that. When we accept support, we also give others the opportunity to act on their sense of responsibility, care, and professionalism. And if no one dares to accept help, it will likely become more difficult over time to maintain a culture where people naturally reach out to one another.

Accepting support may therefore not only be something we do for ourselves. It can also be a way of supporting the wider work community. In that sense, collegial support is not a zero-sum game. It is a positive balance that, over time, strengthens trust, psychological safety, quality, and responsibility within the culture.

When language keeps the problem alive

The professional identity Catch-22 does not only live within workplace culture. It also lives in language. Because language shapes the way we understand help, support, and professionalism.

When you hear a sentence like: "The coffee is not hot" … you do not automatically imagine cold coffee. The temperature is typically placed somewhere between hot and lukewarm. In the same way, words like "weakness" can still remain as an underlying association when we say: "It is not a weakness to ask for help."

Negations often soften an association, but they do not necessarily change the underlying story that words activate. This is why our choice of words is never accidental. They help shape the narratives through which we understand ourselves, one another, and support itself.

If support is to once again be experienced as a natural part of professional practice, it requires more conscious language around strain, reactions, and collegial support. A language where support is connected with professional judgement, quality, shared responsibility, and knowing when to seek and make use of support from others. Because as long as support is wrapped in words associated with weakness, vulnerability, or inadequacy, it may continue to feel wrong to use it.

A culture where it feels natural to recognise one’s reactions and make use of support from others along the way also begins with a conscious choice of words.